Josef Stalin
Object 'Josef Stalin' belongs to the 'Historical Figure Battle Royale' theme.Connection to Jesus:
Josef Stalin would deliver a stirring speech to the working class, in an attempt to get them to rise up and slaughter Jesus along with all the kulaks. Unfortunately for Stalin, recent economic conditions have obliterated the working class from existence. The vagrants and libertarians who used to make up the workforce would sympathize more with Jesus, and Stalin's speech would backfire on him, an angry mob of ex-workers trampling the would-be secretariat.
Connection to Adolf Hitler:In a 1-on-1 match, Hitler would win just by virtue of being the crazier of the two. But after his victory, Hitler would somehow inexplicably end up in Russia in the middle of winter where he would quickly freeze to death.
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